Today was crazy.. and seemed almost pointless.
We left the mountain around 9am so we could get to Fresno and get BJ to his dentisy appointment and me and Anthony to a passport place. We get Bj to the doctor only to find out he got the directions for the wrong doctor. Finally we arrive at the right one 20 min late which means they can only pull one of his wisdom teeth instead of both...
Then we get to the passport place,.. you need an appointment so we go to another one only to find out that my birth certificate doesnt have all the information they need.. so the whole trip to Fresno became pointless.. I couldnt send my passport stuff out... nothing.. Im back at square one and it makes me wonder... why am I even trying to go to Israel.. I have 100 dollars for the trip and thats it... I needed 2000 by the end of Dec. Its almost impossible for me to even concider being able to go.
Im content though.. dont get me wrong.. God isnt in Israel. Not anymore.. and yes I do believe that the people who have gone and say that it was life changing.. are being honest.. but what makes me douby my God.. how do I know he wont do anything LIFE changing here.. in the united states... If I dont go to Israel.. then I dont go. I made my efforts I sent support letters and Ive given my own money.. Ive prayed... Ill continue to pray and push forward with this.. but ... this is life.. and sometimes God has different plans.
Next subject.. i dyed my hair.. almost black.. Why I keep changing I dont.. Erin bets 20 dollars Ill go back blonde before Joshua is over... I dont know. Im content right now.. dark.. not saying im dark lol.. but.. i almost feel that dark has more to say that light.. wow thats sounds un christian like haha.. I hope you get what I mean.
Sooo.. I want to go on aroad trip... for real... Probably next summer for a month just travel around the US. Im young.. I want to live.. and not be cooped up for the rest of my life... thats just not me
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